Falcon Theatre Presents The Secretary
Falcon Theater 636 Monmouth St, Newport, Kentucky
Falcon Theatre Presents The Secretary
The Secretary
by Kyle John Schmidt
September 19, 20, 25, 26, 27, October 2, 3, and 4, 2025
The Secretary is an offbeat comedy about safety, love, and guns in a world that’s up in arms.
Ruby runs a small-town gun company that aims to protect women by helping them protect themselves. With products like The Bridesmaid, The Babysitter and The Mallwalker, each of the company’s guns is named after a woman who used a gun and saved a life–more often than not, her own. When an elderly secretary at the local high school confronts a threat in her office with six bullets, Ruby responds by naming her latest gun after the reluctant hero: “The Secretary.” But as production begins on The Secretary, guns start going off all around town–and no one’s pulling the trigger…but sales are through the roof!
About Falcon
Falcon has always been dedicated to both our artists and our audience as the relationship between the two is what makes live theater such an exceptional art. The creation of a play takes collaboration between actors, directors, designers, and a host of talented people. But it is the union of our finished piece with the emotional and intellectual response of you, our audience, that creates a performance.
For more information call 513-479-6783 or visit falcontheater.net/