Patsy was our business cow
Took her job seriously
She gave her milk, and kept her place
And never noticed me
Kitty was our hateful cow
The meanest of the three
She seemed to hate her job, her life
And clearly hated me
Spuddy was our friendly cow
She did her job with glee
She gave her milk, and ate her grass
Was very fond of me
One day when I was three years old
I had a great idear
I thought I’d milk old Spuddy, so
I crept up to her rear
But when I grabbed her by the teat
She kicked and sent me flying
I was out cold, so I was told
They thought that I was dying
I learned a lesson on that day
I barely dodged a killing
You never want to touch a girl
Unless you know she’s willing
Bruce Bishop, San Angelo, Texas*
* Bishop grew up on a farm near Centertown (Ohio County).